Social Media and Trust 2

I think that one of my favorite quotes I read about social media was something along the lines of “you can have my banking information, but stay away from my Facebook passwords”

Have you ever looked back through boxes of your old stuff and thought “Wow, if someone else were to see this, they would totally get the wrong idea.” If another person looked through it and you were not there to explain it, the conclusions that they came to could be less than flattering.

Nowadays social media occupies a similar role. People have grown up in the digital era and have archives of information dating back more than a decade. At one point we thought a single photo in an album could be embarrassing, now we have whole galleries. These snapshots in our lives can be nostalgic, embarrassing, and even damaging at times.

With that in mind, we often become protective of the information that we keep in accounts. We are nervous about sharing it the same way we are nervous about sharing our innermost thoughts. There is a certain vulnerability to letting your better half know what you are thinking. It is often done gradually as the relationship and trust build up.

Letting someone into your phone is like opening up a diary. They have free reign to examine whatever they like without the benefit of context. It makes one feel very exposed. This is where trust and boundaries come into play.

One person may be able to access the information, but in doing so they show a lack of trust in their partner and insecurity in the relationship. Going through a person’s phone or account is one way of alleviating that nagging feeling. Talking to your significant other is a better way to go about it. When we are experiencing thoughts that make us feel insecure, the best way to get rid of them is to go to the source. Sharing your experience with your significant other lets them know that you have a concern and that you want their help in solving it. A good way to approach this is to ask them to have a conversation with you (check out this article on communication tips). The use of an “I” Statement is an excellent way to share a thought or feeling without putting your better half in a defensive mood