How to limit the doubt when you break up with someone: 4 tips
We all know that breakups are hard. Even if you are the one who is going to do the breaking, it can mess with you for a bit. Emotions are going to be showing up at the wrong time and leading down paths that are not healthy for you. This is true if you leave someone as well. If the relationship has been souring for a long time, there is a relief to getting out of it.
If you’re discounting the relationship, you will discount the effort needed to make it a great one.
Remember, relief is just one of the feelings that are likely waiting for its chance. The next time you meet somebody you’re interested in, disenchantment might sneak in. “Why do I bother to pursue someone new when I know how this story plays out?”
Well, yeah, if you’re writing the ending first, you are going to start heading down that old, familiar path. When it comes to relationships, we try hard to keep the lessons. They’re not all going to be perfect fits. Usually, we just get a few of those that are close. The work of a relationship is to get it the rest of the way.
Looking at an entire group of people in the most general of terms is an easy way to avoid investing in the relationship.
“All men are the same” comes to mind. Which is true to a point. So are all women. So are all mammals if we want to go out far enough. The point is, it does not help us find a mate. There’s a suspicion that we could end up back in the same place we were. If someone is so great, why are they single? I recommend asking why as opposed to judging them prematurely.
To be the one ending the relationship takes strength. It requires an optimism that the unknown is going to work out better than where you are. If the relationship is a dumpster fire, it’s not going to be too difficult to imagine that. On the other hand, an Okay relationship can be hard to move on from. It’s almost safe. It takes guts and optimism to leave safe.
Be aware of your self-doubt and give it an honest examination.
If you’re sure that you have done your part in the relationship and you two are not heading in the same direction anymore, it might be time to part ways. Make sure you can look back and say that you tried to make it better before moving one. It will prevent regret later.
Proactivity is the key.
I don’t mean break up before you are broken up with. I mean take the steps necessary to limit the emotional waves that will come for you. By decreasing the doubt through action and healthy examination of your situation, you will be able to leave a relationship cleanly. There may still be pain, but there will be less doubt.